Isolation and Ignorance.

So these are two of my least favourite words and unfortunately they are very closely related (for me anyway.. anyone else?). There was an article in the paper today on Lyme and how the Australian government doesn't recognise its existence in Australia. Obviously I know it exists in Australia.... where else would I have got it considering I haven't been overseas? I've walked into doctors offices and had them look at my blood test results and tell me it isn't true, I'm either lying or it's all in my head. Ouch. The ignorance of the Australian health department and doctors hurts, yes, but to me it doesn't compare to the isolation felt due to the absolute isolating nature of Lyme disease.

As it is an illness that isn’t very well known it’s extremely hard for people to understand what it’s like to live with every day. People usually only see you when you’re having an okay day and have possibly put on some make-up or simply people seeing you smile may lead them to think everything is ok. I am by no means blaming anyone for my feelings of isolation, I’m simply stating how I feel. The actual symptoms of Lyme are isolating in themselves, I know personally I’m usually unable to go anywhere and if I do I’m in a wheelchair. For an 18 year old (and I’m sure for all ages) being house bound drives you absolutely crazy. One frustrating thing for me is coming to an age where I have my licence and I’m legally and adult, and yet most of the time I can’t drive at all and I definitely don’t feel like an adult when I have to rely on my parents to pretty much do everything for me, cook, drive, help with school work, sometimes even having to help me walk from the lounge room to my room.

I’ve found myself becoming very angry with nobody in particular, mostly just the situation I find myself in, (being totally isolated, loosing friends, being sick and having a really annoying health department) but then I think... why be angry? Where is that going to get me? Wouldn’t I be much better off possibly connecting with a group of people who know what I’m going through such as Lyme or CFS support sites and what not? (this is a bit of a touchy subject with me but I’m learning). Also I may have lost friends but I still have a select few that are totally willing to help me out when I’m feeling completely cut off from the world. And I have an amazing family who love and support me in anything. So what right do I have to not ask for help? Especially when they offer.

Don’t get me wrong, if you have feelings whether it be anger, sadness, frustration etc. I’m absolutely all for letting yourself feel them and then move on. But I’ve decided to reach out to those around me and ask for help (something my A type personality has never been good at) and I think it’s going to be really good for me.

But I realise not everyone has been equally blessed with support around them, and if you’re reading this and feel that way there are others in the same boat, and being one of them I know I’m willing to help so I’m sure others will be too. (that sounded totally lame but I hope you get my gist)

So that’s my half complaining/ half trying to be supportive rant over.